I'm English so:

• I do not speak any other foreign language (all silly bloody foreigners should learn english).

• I Invade foreign countries and steal all their stuff to put in my museums.

• I behave like a barbarian from an invading horde when going on holiday.

• I speak in a hugh grant style upper class accent and say "gosh" a lot.

• I am incredibly polite and never offend anyone

• I throw chairs at police and be a football hooligan

• I have a stiff upper lip and I am used to being very formal with peopl.

• I make jokes and laugh about absolutely everything and I never take anything seriously.

• I understand sarcasm and use it as a merciless weapon with which to beat people who don't understand it with, especially some of our cousins across the pond.

• I do whatever our "big brother" USA say: "yes George", "no George" and now: "yes Barack", "no Barack"...

• I have invented most sports in the world but I am useless at most of them.

• I am Having tea with the queen every saturday at 5,00.

• I am talking about the weather ALL the time.

• I live in the most multicultural city in the world in london and I get on well with everyone.

• I am not even able to live with the scrooge scots, the idiot welsh on our island and do not even mention the smelly french or bloody germans.

• I am modest, I dislike show offs and always use understatements. e.g. saying: "its raining slightly outside", when in reality a reincarnated Noah is frantically building a new ark to try and save at least some of the world population from drowning.

• I say silly things such as "hello old boy".